Posts Tagged ‘emotional development’
You know the thing about patience is the more you ask for it, the more your patience is tested. Whenever we are going through a challenging stage, growth spurt, or bad day I often find myself praying for patience. But the thing is, it always seems to get harder rather than easier. Is it just me? That’s the thing about patience that I don’t like. Trying to get more inevitably drains what little I have.
Taking family pictures: ultimate exercise of patience!
In fact, for an entire year I completely eradicated the word patience from my vocabulary. I refused to use it. I was so frustrated with how much harder it felt when I tried to improve my patience that I just gave up on the quality all together. I worked on other aspects of parenting, such as understanding my child’s needs, instead of asking for patience. I really enjoyed that year. I felt like I made noticeable improvements in my parenting. But after a while I came to terms with patience.
That’s when I found the thing about patience that makes sense to me. The thing I actually like about patience. Now it’s not a taboo word in my vocabulary. It’s an attribute I actually want to possess. Want to know what the thing I like is? I thought so.
Here’s the thing about patience I actually like: Patience is a muscle. Pretty simple. The more you exercise your muscles, the stronger they get. It’s hurts a bit to make your muscles stronger, but even in the soreness that follows, you are able to lift more the next day. The more consistently you exercise your muscles the stronger they get and they stay strong. But when you stop exercising, you lose that strength and have to start again, at a weaker state than you remember being, and work up to your ideal again.
When Brent started medical school, I was shocked at how hard it was for me to manage our house and kids while he studied SO MUCH. I thought it had been hard when he worked and went to school, but this was a whole new animal. It look me about 18 months, but I was finally feeling like I had a handle on the daily grind. We were in a good groove for a while. Then the semester ended and we had Brent with us full time during his break. We traveled together as a family and spent a lot of quality time together. Then we returned home and I had my first day home with the kids without Brent. It was awful! I was so impatient with everything. It was shocking how hard the day was. The last time I had been in our home taking care of everything while Brent was at school had been a really good day. And now, a couple months later, the same scenario was nothing short of disastrous.
I’ve had to start again building my patience muscle. We’ve had good days and rough days but we’re steadily climbing uphill. Even with beginning our homeschool journey with Sammi, managing naps and meal schedules and leaving Brent alone long enough to study I’m more patient than I was that first day back from vacation. And soon enough I’ll be back to where I was the day we had our summertime family picture (below) taken. And then some!
Our Family May 2011
How strong is your patience muscle?
Scott had his 4 month old check up this week (yes, it was the DAY before his 5 month birthday!) He is growing rapidly. The doctor very seriously charted his height and weight and then proclaim, still in a very serious voice, “He is officially growing like a weed.” That cracked me up.
But before that moment, we had spent nearly and hour and a half at the office waiting, er patiently, for our turn. I brought a snack and some books for the girls. They did great in the “healthy kid” waiting room with the toys there. But by the time we got to our exam room, they were getting antsy.
That’s when Sammi and I discovered a chart on the wall (conveniently placed above some chairs) that helps kids and adults identify their level of pain. I remember reading this chart a thousand times a day when I was in the hospital after Scott was born. I definitely used its definitions and lingo to communicate my pain after the C-section up till I was discharged. But the best part of the chart is the faces that help kids identify their pain.
- Image from Wikidoc.org (Not the exact one I stared at, but the same idea)
We first went through all the faces and how much pain they indicated. Then the girls took turns being the doctor or the patient. The doctor asked how the patient felt and the patient pointed at the face that matched their pretend pain. This is where the chairs were helpful so they could reach the poster.
After several minutes of that fun we switched to making the faces of the chart. Trying to match our face to each level of pain. One we had a pretty good handle on that, we turned it into a guessing game. One person would make a face and the other two of us would guess which one it was. It was great because all three of us girls (Scott was napping at this point) were really engaged in this activity.
The pain scale chart gave us about twenty minutes of entertainment. And we learned a ton from it. We practiced role playing, imitating facial expressions, turn taking, understanding our bodies, and communicating with a doctor.
How do you survive a long visit at the doctor’s office?
Today I’m over at TakingTime4Mommy sharing three truths about toddlers that will help you keep your sanity. Here’s a glimpse at the first truth…
Having a toddler around can be very trying on your patience, creativity and ingenuity. There is so much going on in that little body that it often gets the best of them and us as we try to work through our daily routine. Here are three things to keep in mind that will help you keep your sanity.
Toddlers love repetition.
Repetition is a great learning tool for adults and toddlers. The difference is that adults get bored with repetition long before toddlers do.
I watched my friend’s little boy just a few days before he turned two. For the couple hours he was at my house we had the same conversation a few dozen times. It went something along these lines,
Boy: “Where’s my daddy?”
Me: “At work.”
Boy: “Light?”
Me: “Yes, that’s a light.”
Boy: “Where’s my mommy?”
Me: “Studying.”
Boy: “She go the van?”
Me: “Yes, she left in the van.”
And repeat.
At first I thought I wasn’t understanding him. Then I thought he didn’t understand me. Then I realized it was a game for him. He wanted to interact with me but his abilities are still limited so he engaged me the best he could. This exchange built his confidence with the language and his turn taking skills which are both an important part of communicating.
Click over to the full post on TakingTime4Mommy.com to read about the other two truths that will help you keep your sanity with your toddler.
photo credit: davitydave
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We often use music in our home to lull the girls to sleep. Actually, we use it when we’re not at home too! Especially on late night car rides. Over the years we’ve established a pretty solid set of songs the girls like and we know the words too. We chose slower songs with messages of love, comfort and security. The girls seem to melt away into sleep hearing these classics. I’ve often caught Brent falling asleep to them too! Okay, I’ll be honest, I’ve nodded off a few times myself.
Music has the ability to set the mood. This works both to quiet down and to wake up our little ones. Elli is proving to be such a cuddle bug when she wakes up from a nap. She insists on taking her blanket with her when she gets out of bed and then sitting on my lap all wrapped up for quite some time. Sammi was a bit of a cuddle bug, too, back in the day. I made up a song about “My Cuddle Bug” that I had completely forgotten until Brent sang it last week to Elli. So I thought I’d share a video of Elli and I cuddling while I sang her that song.
Like I said on Monday, out little ones love to hear US sing, even if we don’t know the words or tune, even if we make up a song as we go along. Some tender memories for me are centered around times that we have randomly burst into song because it matched our activity or mood. Don’t be afraid to croon your own lullaby when you can’t think of a single song.
But, in case you want a few ideas, here are some of our favorites to sing:
- Hush Little Baby
- Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star
- I am Like a Star
- Jesus Once Was a Little Child
- For the Beauty of the Earth
What are your quiet time favorites? A comment here counts as an extra entry for this week’s giveaway. Make sure you comment over here, too!
I was at the health department last month and picked up an information card highlighting milestones of child development for little ones birth through 4 years old. I thought it fitting to share with you as it has great things to look for in your little ones as they change month to month.
The purpose of the CDC’c campaign “Learn the Signs. Act Early.” is to help parents and healthcare providers catch the signs of developmental delays and disorders early so resources and treatments can begin as early as possible thus allowing children the maximum benefit from those resources and treatments.
I’ve been blessed with two healthy little ones so I love this information from a “oh ya, she does that now!” perspective. But my best friend from high school just told me that her second child was recently diagnosed with high functioning autism. A label to the behavior somehow seems to change the whole experience. Sometimes it’s in a good way because now real information and solutions become available. But sometimes it’s in a negative way when there’s denial or an uncooperative attitude from a parent or teacher. I think information is the key to understanding. That coupled with the love we have for our little ones will get us and them far in this life.
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